ic contact post

[countdone]

Comments

[airshow]

they also don't usually feature rogues and possessed phones!
there's a first time for everything!
don't be so closed-minded!

p.s. I'm saving this conversation forever because you admitted that I'm your BEST FRIEND

[ a series of incoherent emojis: party hat, party hat, party hat, sparkle, alligator, corn cob, heart ]

[countdone]

And now I already regret saying that.

Look, I know that it's literally impossible for you to stop being an obnoxious asshole, but you're getting pretty close to crossing a line here.

[airshow]

[ well now he's just Confused and a little bit annoyed. ]

seriously?
what did I do THIS time?

[countdone]

You might be able to joke like that but I can't. Because the second I do it'll be like I'm hitting on you and you won't like it anymore. With a lot of straight guys, it means you won't like me anymore.

But if I don't play along then I'm just being a fun ruiner, right? Touchy gay man can't take a joke! Even if the joke starts to turn into the very idea of someone being gay being hilarious.

[airshow]

[ There's a very

long

pause

while he finishes this wine cooler. ]

Well NOW you're being a fun ruiner.
See, it's funny because I'm 10000% not your type.
I really hate it when I have to explain the punchline, but That Is The Joke.

[countdone]

Do you even know what my type is?

[That was a really, really obvious attempt to deflect, James.]

[airshow]

[ Deflecting is what he's good at! Deflecting and distractions! ]

Tall, dark, and handsome?
Now, two out of three ain't bad, but I'm sure you have some objections to my winning personality.

[countdone]

[UGGGGGGGGGGGGGH this is so frustrating.]

Look, regardless...you're missing the point. And you KNOW it.

[airshow]

HA. So I got it right.
Is the point "stop flirting with me because I hate fun"?

[countdone]

Okay James, how about this:

How do you think you'd react if I took you seriously? Or started flirting with you?

[airshow]

The real question is why would ANYONE take me seriously?

[countdone]

That's beside the point!

[airshow]

That's the ENTIRE POINT!

[countdone]

I swear to god, I am going to walk to your apartment, break in and punch you in the goddamn face.

[airshow]

So what I'm hearing is I'm DEFINITELY not your type.

[countdone]

Fine, you know what? Whatever. I don't care anymore.

I should know better than to try to talk to you about anything.

[airshow]

[ FUCK OFF WITH THE GUILT TRIP ]

Okay so like
You're saying you think if you played along with my dumb joke instead of getting all bent out of shape about it, I'd get all weird all of a sudden and think you were seriously into my hot bod?

Because we've established that you don't want to jump me.
And you're immune to my charming personality and rockin abs.
Don't ask me how. I'd go gay for me.
But there's no accounting for taste.

[countdone]

[IT'S A GUILT TRIP HE DESERVES!!!]

It's not like you've never gotten all weird of a sudden before.

You just don't get it, do you? It's not even just about you. It's about having to watch what I do and say any time I'm around any straight guy who knows I'm gay, because how many of them will look at me like I'm some kind of threat after one wrong move? Even if they say they're not homophobic.

I know you heard the things some of the other rogues used to say about me, even when I went out of my way to stress how completely disinterested I was in all of them. It's not like you don't have any frame of reference at all.

[airshow]

I'm not
like that

I mean I know how I acted when we were on the run but that was

ugh
uggggggghhhhhhhhhh

I already EXPLAINED

[airshow]

Look, I jumped in front of like a dozen bullets for you.
Dumbass.
You seriously think I'm gonna be hung up on what you like to do in the sack?

[countdone]

Are you seriously saying you still don't get why I'd be uncomfortable here? Even after all that?

And I mean, isn't it different when we're talking about any other guy and when we're talking about you?

[airshow]

Well for one thing, I'd punch any other guy in the face, and I don't exactly have the flexibility to punch MYSELF that hard.
So there's that difference.

[countdone]

No, I meant with uh. Flirting and...beyond.

I was saying it'd bother you less if you weren't...involved.

Thanks for offering to punch people, though, I guess.

[airshow]

I'm either too drunk or not drunk enough to figure out what you're getting at with that.

[countdone]

Yeah, maybe I shouldn't've let myself get caught up in arguing with a drunken moron.