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Hey, don't knock it 'til you've tried it.

[ He deposits a bowl of rainbow marshmallows in Piper's lap (with a spoon, because he's a GENTLEMAN), and plops down on the couch next to him, setting his feet on the coffee table. ]

You can't be all maudlin while you're shoving marshmallows into your face, that's just laws of nature.

[ Or so he's hoping, anyway. For himself, mostly. ]

I appreciate the concern for my emotional health.

[He feels kind of silly eating a bunch of marshmallows with a spoon, because he is ingrate.]

Well, y'know, I care and stuff.

[ Embrace it, Piper. Embrace the silly. ]

Yeah, it really shows.

[Well he's eating it, so it's apparently not too silly]

Hey.

[ He leans, all heavy and obnoxious, against Piper's shoulder. Look, see, he missed being all touchy and annoying, okay? ]

You've seen how I treat the guys I don't give a damn about.

[He sighs.]

Yes, that's true. I guess I should be extra grateful then.

Definitely. Shower me with gratitude, tell me how great I am.

[ He's had a rough few days, please lavish attention upon him. ]

[He gives him a shove.]

Don't push your luck.

But Piiiper, that's what I'm best at!

[ He bumps right back against his shoulder again. Shoving is so rude. ]

Oh, shut up and eat your marshmallows! You're the one that wanted them.

[He's elbowing him in the side this time.]

[ Fine, fiiiine, squirming away to his side of the couch. ]

Yeah, but yours were a gift, so chow down on that sugar while you can, buddy.

Yes, because I'd have such a hard time getting my hands on some otherwise.

Yeah, but where else are you gonna find company this good, huh?

You really don't want me to answer that one.

[LEFT YOURSELF WIDE OPEN THERE.]

Careful, I'm in a delicate emotional state here.

That's why I went easy on you.

[ snort. ]

Why's everyone think you're the nice one again?

Because I actually care about the state of humanity?

Uh, objection, what about that time I saved the whole entire planet from becoming Satan's slip and slide when even the Justice League couldn't?

But do you recycle?

[And this is exactly why James called Piper a shit.]

[ This is why he's flicking a marshmallow at him, god. ]

You're soooo right. Throwing away my Spaghetti-Os cans totally negates world-saving.

[ And maybe if he jokes about it, he'll forget those very recent, very real hallucinations. Yeah? Sure. ]

You're saving the world even more every day when you recycle!

[He's 100% aware of how ridiculous this sounds.]

Not sure that matters, in the big karmic scheme of things.

Sure it does! Helping people every day is worth more than doing it only once.

Uh-huh. How many newspapers equals one entire planet?

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countdone - 2015-10-05 09:25 (UTC) - Expand

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